Magritte
by lookitallthecolors
Summary: VN-GO decides to indulge his creative side, much to Captain McCrea's dismay. One-shot.


All the robots had hobbies. WALL-E collected junk, EVE maintained a beautiful little garden, and even MO, feeling a bit left out, had gathered an assortment of polished stones.*

VN-GO had his art.

When Captain McCrea had declared that all defectives without major mechanical problems were permanently released from the Repair Ward, VN-GO used his new-found freedom to study the technique and history of art. Obsessively.

He felt he was getting pretty good at it too. It helped that with the expansion of the colony and restoration of many old buildings, his services were also much in demand, giving him valuable practice. While the other VN-GOs were passable at repainting buildings and such, only he had the necessary _spark_, so to speak. Everyone wanted a VN-GO unit 067.

The only one who didn't was Captain Bob McCrea.

Once a year, he would come to repaint McCrea's little office, which also served as the colony's impromptu town hall. And every year the request was the same.

"Just whitewash it, please."

After the first rather bemused session, VN-GO took it upon himself to explain to the Captain that while he would always be happy to help, whitewashing was a waste of his talents. Another 'bot could do just as good a job as he could.

McCrea's response? He wanted VN-GO unit 067 to do the job. No one else.

VN-GO then asked if he could at least do _something_ to make it more interesting. Perhaps a…

No. Just a whitewash. Nothing fancy, he didn't want people thinking he was getting snooty.

So, once again, VN-GO found himself moodily slopping white paint on the building. It was all _flat._ And _boring._ Why couldn't he just add just a teeny tiny bit of color? But no, apparently an angry mob would descend and burn the office down if there was any sort of originality to the outside of McCrea's office.

Distracted with his ruminations, he accidentally streaked his brush over the door. Leaving a gigantic streak of white paint. Argh.

He stared at the door. Why was the universe so unfair? He could be doing something else. Something _fun_. But no, he was stuck here, doing a job that the dullest of 'bots could handle.

VN-GO had almost decided to go off and give the Captain a piece of his mind, when something began niggling at him. He froze. It was that familiar sensation he always got before work, real work. _Inspiration._

Looking at his mistakenly painted door again, his mind started racing. Yes, perfect…

* * *

A half hour later, VN-GO moved back to critically examine his art. Hm. No, it still needed something else. Something… more.

But what?

Then inspiration struck yet again. He went off to find BURN-E.

* * *

The next morning, Captain McCrea was leisurely walking to his office. He always liked to take his time, as it was nice to be able to greet his fellow colonists, both robot and human.

When he got to the 'Town Hall,' he stopped, blinking confusedly. Was something a little... off? McCrea shook his head. Nah. Must be his imagination. Stuff always looked different after getting a fresh coat of paint.

Entering the building, he promptly ran into the door.

_Ow._

Rubbing the rapidly swelling lump on his head, he tried the knob again. It turned fine, but the door kept refusing to open. What the hell?

Suddenly, he noticed what had seemed odd earlier. The door was completely flat. Like, say, _if it were painted on_.

He backed up and carefully looked over the wall again. There it was. He walked over to the real door, and easily opened it. It was completely white now, making it almost indistinguishable from the surrounding wall.

The Captain grunted. This had to be VN-GO's doing. He'd better have a little talk with that 'bot… Making sure to leave the actual door wide open, McCrea went back over to give the painted one a last eyeballing. To his surprise, he found a little plaque mounted next to it that he had completely overlooked.

It read in large, even letters:

_**Ceci n'est pas une porte.**_

_**

* * *

**_*Of course, MO always referred to it as a 'selection of geological samples,' and claimed that they were a part of his training to become a 'mineral prospector.' Secretly, though, it came down to the fact that he really liked cleaning the small rocks he found.


End file.
